Weird weather day today, what with the nor'west arch looming over the mountains. Unseasonal.
I feel weird today, I guess I'm in a weird space. Living here in my beloved Christchurch but also living partly in Sydney - I'm looking and applying for jobs, looking at places to rent, thinking about selling my stuff, saving, mentally I guess saying goodbye to my life here.
Everything just feels uneasy and I hate that.
So these toadies suit me today.
I like them, all in a pile.
There are just so many things I don't like about myself. I just wish I were more motivated to change the things I don't like. Sometimes I just feel so powerless.
I've lost 10 kilos but a big part of me just thinks, well wont I inevitably just put that back on? What is the point? I've been big all my life, why would I be different now?
I don't know.
Winter, you are in my bones.
2 comments:
You have more than 2 readers! That's the thing about change - it's always a little bit exciting and a little bit scary and it takes time - but the difference for us is that God is with us through the changes. I pray God will exceed your expectations as your move forward in your life.
I didn't tell you yet, but I adore your new blog layout. The mushrooms, the text, the wood. Fantastic.
You're pretty amazing. I don't know. I just think you are.
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