Tuesday, June 14, 2005

I Can't Study

Well, perhaps more truthfully I don't study. I did yesterday, but today I have done NOTHING. I just cannot bring myself to work.

The problem is, I am not panicked. I have no panic. None. I feel calm. I don't feel worried. It's like some kind of weird dream.

I will probably fail.

But, I just have no panic.

Because, I know I wont fail.

That is the problem.

And I am TIRED.

And there are so many interesting and fun things to do with my time.

Like this. And visiting Shannon and Amy at Opawa, and going to the Art Gallery, and setting up still more blogs. And emailing.

And thinking about artworks I could do, and poems I could write, and songs I could sing.

And planning trips to Kaikoura.

And going flatting.

I need to PUSH THE PANIC BUTTON! But, it has disappeared.



andrew brown said...

"I will probably fail."
"Because, I know I wont fail."

what? hows that work? is it like saying "im not likely to win the lotto, but i do have the winning ticket, so i am going to"?

so does the first quote refer to the failing potential before any other factors (as in talent/study time) but the second directly to your and your specific situation?

Lynne said...

I SOOOO remember!
The ability to study is directly proportional to the desperate need to study.
No need, no study.
Much need, much study.

You'll be fine
(is that helpful, or REALLY unhelpful?)
If you are going to take a break take a decent break, not a slob around feeling guilty but can't be bothered sort of one.
And then tomorrow study, cos you MUST!

Iain said...

My wise T-Shirt once said,

When desperation exceeds your fears progress begins

I suffer from the same problem. I call it megalapsiatextuonominalism or, "taking gargantuan breaks before studying and granting disproportionately large 'rewards' after any task accomplished no matter how insignificant to the actual goal required of oneself".

But seriously, my panic has slowly faded away over years of study until I experience too little now. I don't panic until the assignment is due this week, the next day or even - in one or two cases recently - yesterday. It's really quite a disease, but it's not my fault. Megalapsiatextuonominalism is highly communicable and airbourne. Really, I should just rest more until I recover from it.

I think i'll go do that now; Perhaps I'll email somebody... or plan a holiday... for medicinal purposes, of course.